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Clip 4 - Are You Doing in Me Bedroom? Edit

  • [later at Heavy house]
  • Heavy: Oh, me back. Well, here goes another useless attempt to sleep on me mount less, lumpy mattress.[lays on his mattress] Huh, that's qu**r. Me mattress seems strangely c*zy and butter-l*ke... [falls asleep]
  • Scout, Demoman & Engineer: Surpr*se!
  • Heavy: Armageddon! Wh*t? Oh, you? What in the blue eye scallop are you guys doing in me bedr**m?
  • Scout: We noticed how miserable you were on your lumpy, old mattr*ss.
  • Engineer: So I suggested we get you a new one.
  • Demoman: [talking to Scout] I thought it was your idea.
  • Heavy: So, where's me old mattr*ss th**? [fury goes up]
  • Engineer: Don't worry, Mr. Heavy, I took care of that personally, me t**. I had it hauled away to the dump.
  • Heavy: [jumps on Engineer] All my money was in that mattr*ss.
  • Engineer: What? Haven't you ever heard of a b**k?
  • Heavy: No! [walks backward, hits his lamp and trashes some books]
  • Scout: Mr. Heavy!
  • Heavy: No! [faints]
  • Demoman: And we got you a card.
  • Heavy: Is there money in i*?
  • Demoman: Nope. [Heavy faints again.]

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